Most Frequent Questions Asked of Santa

The two most joyous times of year are Christmas morning and the end of school.
— Alice Cooper
He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree.
— Roy L. Smith

(from Santa Guide for the Macy’s Santa)
Q: What are the names of your reindeer?
A: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen & Rudolph
Q: Whose child is Rudolph?
A: Donner’s.
Q: How do the reindeer fly?
A: They are fed a magic mixture of corn and oats that only grows near the North Pole.
Q: Where are the reindeer now?
A: The ones that brought Santa here are sleeping, the rest are at the North Pole.
Q: Where do you live?
A: The North Pole.
Q: How many Elves do you have?
A: Hundreds and hundreds.
Q: What’s your favorite color?
A: Red.
Q: What do the Elves do?
A: Make the toys and keep Santa’s list of who is naughty and nice.
Q: Are you married?
A: Yes, to Mrs. Claus.
Q: Where is Mrs. Claus?
A: Sometimes she’s at Macy’s, sometimes the North Pole.
Q: What’s your favorite kind of cookie?
A: Santa loves all kinds of cookies, but especially Christmas cookies.
Q: Are you lactose intolerant?
A: No, Santa likes all kind of milk, except buttermilk, although he will use buttermilk in cakes and pancakes.
Q: What kind of snack can I leave for the reindeer?
A: The reindeer like cookies too, but they really love carrots, celery, and lettuce.
Q: How do you fit down the chimney?
A: Magic.
Q: How do you get into a home that doesn’t have a chimney?
A: Magic.
Q: What do you do the rest of the year?
A: Make toys, & keep naughty and nice lists.
Q: Do you use a computer?
A: Yes, a special one designed and built by the Elves.
Q: Do you read every letter that you get, and every wish list?
A: Every one, and the Elves help Santa remember the details.
Q: What if a child is visiting with relatives on Christmas Eve? Will you find that child?
A: Santa knows where all the good children are on Christmas Eve, and visits them all, no matter how far from home.
Q: How do you fly around the world in one night?
A: Through a combination of lots of practice and hard work, judicious use of time zones, and a little magic.
Q: How come Santa doesn’t visit everyone on Christmas Eve?
A: He does, and always leaves the greatest gift of all—love.
Q: How come I don’t always get everything on my list?
A: Thanks to the Elves and children’s lists, Santa knows what presents every child wants to receive. However, sometimes Santa also knows that the child’s family or guardian have other special things in mind. Also, Santa does not like to bring gifts that he knows parents, etc. would prefer the child not to have—such as a horse, or toys that they think the child should wait a year or so to get, or that might be inappropriate.
Q: Do you need snow to deliver the toys?
A: No, Santa delivers toys all around the world, including many places where it never snows.
Q: How do you know who has been naughty and who has been good?
A: Magic.
Q: How come I see you in so many places?
A: Santa can move very quickly, and he also has many helpers who dress like him at Christmas time to make sure he gets every child’s wish list.
Q: Can I pull your beard?
A: Only if I can pull your hair just as hard. (Or ear or nose.)
Q: How old are you?
A: “As old as my tongue, and slightly older than my teeth.”
Q: What do you want for Christmas?
A: Peace on Earth, goodwill towards all people.
Q: Are you the real Santa?
A: Of course.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to All. I Hope Santa is good to you this year